It’s Snow Fair

Monday, 18 March 2013


Sorry if snow related puns ruin your day, there’s snow more, honest.

I have been putting off this entry in the hope that I would get some good news from the GIC soon. But alas, ‘soon’ appears to be a word that is seldom used at the clinic.

Here’s the current situation: My second appointment was due on the 18th January. Unfortunately the god of weather decided I’d be better off staying in and began dumping inch upon inch of snow onto the unsuspecting ground. Now, in case you didn’t know the UK as a whole does not react well to the white stuff. Cancellations and amended timetables were the order of the day at the train station, but that didn’t really matter because getting to the train station was hard enough in itself. Bearing in mind it takes me over three hours in total to get to the clinic, there was snow chance that I was going to get there in time, if indeed I got there.

So I phoned them up and postponed it. I did it as soon as I could that day, but due to their high cancellation rates and the ‘NHS Guidelines’ you are supposed to give 48 hours notice. This had me concerned as I really didn’t want to have to go through the whole GP, psychiatrist treatment again. I also sent in the letter of cancellation (which they require) and basically since then I’ve been left in the dark.

I’ve been trying to get through to them the past few weeks, but they’ve either been busy or engaged, sometimes immediately after each other which is peculiar. But thankfully last week I broke through and got to speak to someone. I asked about my appointment and she reassured me that they had received my letter and my appointment would be rearranged, but she did not specify a timeframe.

It has been two months since I was supposed to have my appointment and I wouldn’t have heard a thing from them if I hadn’t phoned them myself. Is this what they are like? I was under the impression that once you are an actual patient of the clinic things started moving a little quicker. Maybe I was being optimistic.

The other result of this is that the Finasteride which I had started a course on, has since finished and I have been unable to continue it until it’s cleared by Dr. Lorimer.

So there you go. I’ve found the right road to head down, but unfortunately it’s covered in snow and the only people with a snow shovel are withholding it.

In other news, news I failed to mention last time; I have a nice new written warning from work. Just like the time I stole a turkey but didn’t. Only this time I had a debilitating illness and couldn’t breathe properly. I think it’s only fair I’m punished for that, no? The written warning basically means that for 12 months I won’t get a pay rise or a bonus if we get one at all.

Because I was off longer than is allowed and because my illness isn’t underlying, I have been issued with a big smack round the ear hole. Gotta love absence policies.

Well since then I have written up a letter to Head Office explaining my situation and my unhappiness about it. It shall be sent today and I really hope I get a reply from it. I doubt anything will actually change because of it, but I just feel like I wanted to share my personal experience with their policies and what I felt about it.

In other, other news. Pictures! I have got quite a few ready to upload that I have taken since my last update. A lot of them were taken with my iPad and therefore aren’t quite as clear. To be honest though, the lack of pixels sure makes it easier to achieve a smooth complexion! Also you may notice that I have a new wig or two. Well, eagle eyes, you are correct. I bought a couple near the end of last year and these few sets comprise mostly of those. I’ve gotta say it, blonde does seem to suit me quite well, or at least I think so. I did used to be blonde after all.

So there you go, my life over the past few months, condensed and thrown across a web page for you all to peruse. My song of the moment is actually really more of my album of the moment. That album would be “Tales from the Thames Delta” by The Milk. This song is basically just one of my favourites from that album. They’re a great band and there’s really snow-one like them out there at the moment.

Night! X

IMG_2942 (1)IMG_0107




34 Responses to “It’s Snow Fair”

  1. Pat Says:

    Ciao Ella, è sempre un piacere leggerti. Un abbraccio dall’Italia da un tuo fan! 🙂

  2. Randi Dennis.. Says:

    Dearest Ella,

    First off…the pics are excellent….you look great as always and the blonde is flattering *S* So either the brunette or the blode is a great look…

    Hon as far as work is concerned, employers are being more mean-spirited, if not more sneaky, visceral and underhanded in as much as how they handle legitimate medical issues. As has been mentioned via other means, we have had this issue as well re: the family shop and a really rotten manager doing something similar to the valued folks employed. It stinks, it’s lousy and is incredibly rotten for morale. Especially if someone has or is planning on being there for a while and does not see employment as disposable like…well …torn pantihose. If anything in stating your case to the higher ups, provide as much backup as possible [remember what was mentioned from here with the disability court case? Basically the same idea…backups to backups to backups to make sure the case is as solid as anything that has been fixed with crazy glue…and then some]. When they see this, as well as the totality of your record…they will see there was/is an error that has been made on their part and may even mitigate the warning.

    As for the docs, sorry about the crap they are putting you through. Government agencies, no matter which side of the pond one is on tend to be jerks inasmuch scheduling or for that matter medical issues. The fact that there is austerity on the menu right now does not help matters any [and we are looking at this here as well…should sequestration remain a full reality] and I am sorry you got caught in this. The one item that does come to mind here is ….and it’s something to bring up during the next few communications…is if Your case has been or rather would be grandfathered [or is that ‘grandmothered’] into the process. This will insure that the process will still go on because the record is there and doing anything retroactively to purge the listing would be unconscienable. As well as a tad on the insane side.

    Also about the finasteride, find out if an interim script can be extended while you are waiting on the next appointment. Like here, let’s say if I were to run out of uloric or furosemide, fine…I make one call to the folks at Tar-get and because there is a record and there is a good relationship with the docs who prescribed same, there is the possiblity of an extension until the faxes come in that say ‘yes Randi can be continued on _____’. It’s something to be considered and…seeing You do have a previous script and paper record, why not?

    Remember too that re: work and the NHS that at some point, logic and reason at some point have to prevail. Lest of course the inmates are running the asylum in full. We are hoping that does not happen here in full [Portland is ‘weird’ enough …but there is a different between ‘eclectic weird’ which is diversity in the nicest sense and ‘weird’ which means ‘they’re coming to take someone away to the happy home’] and that prayer for some level of sanity is from here for your situation as well. Keep in mind what has been said from this desk before….and at this point it does bear a little repeating: if the employer is not willing to utilize Your skills and value You as a positive and contributing member of the family there, then there will be others out there who will see same. it is not Your fault that these folks are being myopic…employers again have been acting in this fashion for a while, worse they are trying to turn it into an art form. That said, someone out there is going to see that the skillsets are in place to do great things and will offer You something to expand and grow with that.

    Hon Have a good one….[keep an eye on the bloglink because there may be something up before that ‘oilchange’ post that was mentione via other means]

    Love Always and Stay Strong [remember it is not Your fault that circumstances worked this way, but they can be overcome and put in the rear view mirror],


  3. Sam Says:

    Hiya Ella so good to hear from you ,,, yes you do suit the blond hair , I really feel for you as Chx seems to be knocking you about ,, please keep your chin up and don’t let the bxxxxxds grind you down,,,,,,,, my kindest regards,,,,,,,, Sam,,,,,,

  4. Nikola Vossler Says:

    I know Exactly how you feel about the GIC, Been waiting for them to contact me for 2 moths as well, To be Honest I’m sick of it, but as the others have said, all we can do is to try and break through the monotony, and cope until someone in london gets out of their chair and checks their answerphone, or stops phoning their friend during work hours… ^^
    Snow always gets in the way, you’d have thought we’d have gotten used to freak cold weather for a few days a year,we all share your woes, doll we just have to keep our spirits high, and to not surrender.

  5. Pat Says:

    Ella, quando hai tempo cerca il film ” A Reflection of Fear” (1971), uno dei miei cult movie in assoluto, forse potresti trovarlo interessante. Un kiss 🙂

  6. DEAN JONES Says:

    U look absolutely fabulous in the new photos

  7. DEAN JONES Says:

    U look absolutely fabulous in the new pics

  8. Anna Says:

    Ugh! Sounds like you have come across the ‘gatekeeping’ problem. I’m presuming you are in Bristol. Were I in Swindon still, I’d drive you myself through snow or blow. That is moot, however.
    All I can say is: stay strong. You have people here that care about you, so stick at it and don’t let the buggers grind you down. You know who you are, not them.
    I’m beginning to think that your employers are coming to some conclusions re your gender identity considering their rather draconian attitude to you in general terms. I guess you could front up to them at the end of one week and tell them that you will return Monday as Ella. It is illegal for them to sack you because of this. It is also highly illegal for them to make work so appalling that you might be forced to leave. The EU is good for some things.
    I spent 30 years pretending to be a boy (1971 – 2001). I was wrong to do that. The loss of time was costly, physically. OK the 70s was a different time but the point is that not being true to yourself harms you. Yes, it’s scary. That’s life. These days, things have a fighting chance to turn out well in the end with some chutzpah.
    You look stunning with blonde hair. One day (let’s say the day after the Easter break) you can get a delightful choppy bob in blonde with your own hair with a bit of volume.
    Go get ’em, girl! You are due your moment.

  9. DEAN JONES Says:

    U r so very beautiful with a beautiful smile

  10. hgkhgkhc Says:

    Someone’s ripping off your images again –

  11. rheapdx1 Says:

    Dearest Ella,

    Hon, there is a way of fixing the issue of the pics being used by someone else for a bogus account.

    Practically every photo program available [Photoshop, Polyview, Lview, Gimp, Paint Shop Pro and the plethora of same listed at either or] have an option for watermarking the pics. And yes, there is the means in each of those to make such a mark ‘transparent’ [pun not intended] which cannot be erased, removed or altered. Hence it will be protected.

    There are a couple other means to deal with this and those will be sent over via other means.

    Til later on,



  12. WB Says:

    Hi Ella,

    Any plans for some new pics or a video soon?
    Any news about the clinic?


  13. Anonymous Says:

    Please post more videos and pictures more often

  14. Anonymous Says:

    Yea you should post more videos you are so hot!

  15. Nancy Says:

    U ok? hope u good!? we miss you let us know you are alive?!

  16. Paola Says:

    WOW its been a while since you posted anything… wish you all the best… 🙂

  17. WB Says:

    Hi Ella,

    You have not posted here, on flickr or on youtube for quite a while.
    Is everything ok?
    Are you posting elsewhere?


  18. spacial9 Says:

    Best of luck Ella. Don’t loose heart.

  19. Diana S. Says:

    Hey Ella! Happy Valentine’s Day from the USA! Hope you’re doing ok. Please let us know how things are going:-)

  20. Anonymous Says:

    What happened? Did you get bored with the dressing up…???

  21. Anonymous Says:

    Hope you are ok let us know what you are up too now!?

  22. WB Says:

    Hi Ella, what has happend? You have not posted either here or on flickr for ages.

  23. Missy Wonders Says:

    Ella, are you alright? We’re growing worried for you.

  24. v Says:

    hope you are ok , let us know please 😉

  25. Rachel Says:

    Hi , Ella ,i’m going through the same process slow i know. Have you had any more progress with the GIC?

  26. Anonymous Says:

    I wonder what happened to her

  27. sissysummer Says:

    i love the photos of you with pigtails you look so cute i admire you greatly how do you deal with hte stares when you go out?

  28. Anonymous Says:

    Elle, it’s been over 2 years since you’ve posted anything, are you ok.I hope you would at least post something letting us know you’re ok. We miss you

  29. Anonymous Says:

    I have been following these blogs and posts avidly for nearly five years and a break of two years is too long. To think that all has been abandoned must have solid reasoning behind it. This may just go to show that no matter how much we care about some one, we are utterly powerless to affect change (or continuity) when their circumstances / feelings change. As a UK central(ish) resident I am probably living about an hours’ drive from ‘Becoming Ella’ from her previous accounts. I do not know what that has got to do with it but, I think there are many, many thousands of people following her in silent which she does not know about. Yes it would be nice to keep up to date with her and know how she is getting on.

  30. Anonymous Says:

    He hasn’t visited “tvchix” in over a year either…reality check, it would appear.

  31. John hall Says:

    There is another : girl with something extra: hoo looks aylot like ella.
    It’s maya .i think she,s from Toronto. But now I just found out that there are two other trans girls named maya in Toronto .one of them is by-rayshul ! The hot one , is Danish!

  32. Bethany Says:

    Ella, where have you gone? 😦

  33. John hall Says:

    Markus from Toronto has become maya & looks a lot like Ella from England .thay should check each other out !

  34. Archy Says:

    Hello! I hope here can be Ella’s friends, who know her in her real life. Would you please, send these drawings to her, thanks beforehand!

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