The Waiting Game

Monday, 4 July 2011


I’ve had my appointment at the doctors, and it went… well I guess. It was in many ways different to the time I did it previously. This time I had a male doctor to talk to and, to put it frankly; he didn’t exactly seem that confident talking about it. He seemed fairly unsure about it all and I’m not sure if that was because he didn’t really understand it or he didn’t agree with it, but that’s just the vibe I got from him.

I didn’t really have a lot to tell him that he didn’t already know either. Everything I’d said in the previous appointment was all there in front of him, so he basically just needed to judge my mental stability.

Thankfully he diagnosed me as a stable individual and he said there’s no reason psychologically why I couldn’t get a referral to the Gender Clinic. He mentioned that if I suffered from some kind of crippling depression or the like, then it would be unwise to refer me as I would be less likely to cope with all the after affects of the surgery, which certainly makes sense to me. There I was thinking that I wouldn’t get the referral because I wasn’t unhappy enough and it actually turns out to be the other way around.

So I got the referral. Or at least he said he’d give me a referral. I was hoping to have received a letter from the doctors by now, so I could have spoken about it on here as well, but so far nothing has turned up. It has been three weeks, and I think he said that I should allow more time than that for the letter to turn up, but I’d just like it now, I just want to know what’s happening. The letter is supposed to contain information on whether I’ve been accepted to be funded by the local council. He did mention that it has recently been a lot more likely that funding will be given, so I’m fairly confident about getting that.

This then led me to ask how many people have come in for the same issue as me, and he said that so far this year he’d had about five. He also mentioned that he thought that was quite a high number, but to be honest it’s not far off what I imagined it would be.

So here I am now, waiting for my letter to arrive. He mentioned that if I didn’t get the funding I could call the person that would deal with it directly and see if it could be sorted out from there, but unfortunately he also said that he’d send the number for that person through the post, and obviously so far I’ve received nothing. I really do just have to sit this one through.

Other than the appointment I have actually done a few other things. I celebrated my 24th birthday on the 10th of June and for it I went to see Jimmy Eat World live in London a week or so after. I have to say, they were damn good; would definitely recommend seeing them live if you like their music. To reflect how damn awesome they are I’ll link to possibly their most famous song, even if this isn’t exactly a true reflection of the style of the rest of their tracks.

I’ve also taken and passed my driving theory test and have booked my practical test for the 2nd of August. I am a bit nervous about it, but at the same time quietly confident. Hopefully passing it will open up my job prospects quite considerably even if I can’t afford a car right now. Just being able to drive would be a useful skill.

So there you go, just a quick update as to where I stand. I’m feeling fairly upbeat about it, and just getting on as normal with the rest of my life as this goes on. I cannot let this rule my life.

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Night! X


18 Responses to “The Waiting Game”

  1. Farseer Elorrah Says:

    Happy Belated birthday!
    Congrats on your test and on the impending referral! You’ll get it hon, a Doctor who isn’t worth his word isn’t a very good doctor, so I say just be patient it will arrive.

    Kudos for you in moving forward with your life hon! I wish you the best!

    Your new photos look great!!

  2. Jamie Says:

    I admire you putting yourself out there for all to see you for what you are and that is a woman. The courage you show putting yourself out there is something I could never approach. You are very pretty and these last pictures are beyond belief.You truly have embraced womanhood and I hope everything works out for you. Thanks for all the great photos and words.You are an inspiration. Jamie

  3. Missy Wonders Says:

    Congrats on making it through that step of the process. Keep on pushing through.

    Great pics as always.

  4. rheapdx1 Says:

    Dear Ella,

    Happy Birthday for one….and may there be many many many more!!

    For another, while there is the waiting period in this, remember that the fact that You are taking all the right steps in this will make the next step in the process all the more worthwhile. It happens here too when there was the need for another test, but when the results come down…as well as it being handled by the right parties, that makes the issue a tad more logical. And something says also that the funding issue can be dealt with, assuming they have a sliding scale if there is a hangup.

    Hon also remember too that all of this will come together as it should, along with passing the driving exam. Life for those who do put in the time and effort do get rewarded for it. Keep that one in mind if something comes up that looks like it will stall at that moment.

    Again Happy Birthday Hon…..

    Love Always,



  5. summertime75 Says:

    Blated Birthday wishes, good luck and hope the wait wont be too long. Great to hear Jimmy Eat World.

  6. Anonymous Says:

    Great to hear from you, always disappointing stopping in to old posts. Take care and happy birthday all the same.

  7. Anonymous Says:

    I just read your update earlier when taking a break between shows i told you before i am a Female Impersonator and i have just got home from the the club i was working at tonight.i am working again tomorrow night + Sunday,but off on Monday.i hope things work out ok for you Ella.good luck.x

  8. Lisa Says:

    Good luck Ella.i hope everything goes well for you.x

  9. Ed Says:

    I wouldnt wait to much longer before you either call, go down to the office or write a letter asking for the refferal. Dr’s usually get distracted and he may have forgot. so dont let to much time slip by before you remind him. This is your life so you have to take charge of it.

    that being said, WOW you seem like just the perfect girl, a great personality, beautiful face, and a gorgeous body.

  10. Anonymous Says:

    Just wondering if you have gotten your letter yet?

  11. Lucy Says:

    Congrats on your referral hope you’ve got the letter by now. Good luck for the practical test.

  12. Post Rock Says:

    hello Ella,

    you’re beautiful the way you are, you should keep your original equipment.

    regardless of how it turns out, i wish u the best.

  13. Janine Says:

    Hi Ella, hope everything is ok. Wish you all the best & waiting for your next update! Love, Janine

  14. Jillian Says:

    Happy Belated Birthday. I just found your site last month. Your photos and your words have been the most incredible inspiration to me and I’m sure others as well. Best of luck with your journey. I know things will work out fine for you.
    With prayers and love.

  15. PapiJump online free Says:

    PapiJump free game…

    […]The Waiting Game « Becoming Ella[…]…

  16. Felipe Says:

    Ella, you are so fucking beautiful and perfect it makes me sad knowing I will never be as good-looking as you. I wish you the best.

  17. anna lee Says:

    You look amazing! Wish i looked as good as you.

  18. forbecomingella Says:

    Hello! I hope here can be Ella’s friends, who know her in her real life. Would you please, send these drawings to her, thanks beforehand!

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