And The Results Are In….

Thursday, 25 February 2010


Well it’s taken me this long to get back and sit in front of the screen and write again. I have a problem with writing something when someone else in the room, the same way I do with taking photos of myself and peeing. That’s two separate activities, for the record. That would be much too much hassle. Maybe that’s why some people take pictures of themselves in nappies… Nah, I’m pretty sure they do it for kicks, I can’t say I relate to that myself, but if you do, take a look at this picture I’ve just done…


Goodness sake, now I’ve just wasted time doing that when I could have been writing something of significance. All I wanted to say was that I can’t write when there are people around and pretty much every night my girlfriend tends to stay in the vicinity, she does live here after all. But now she’s asleep on the sofa, and I’m free to do my thing.

So I kind of left you guys hanging after the last one didn’t I? Sorry about that, it was only vaguely intentional! No, in all honestly I didn’t know what was going to happen and I was pretty worried, but I’m sure you’ve now worked out that I should still have a job because if I didn’t I certainly shouldn’t be wasting time making random pictures, and should be doing something useful like filling in a application form or updating my CV. Well you’d be right, even though I probably would still have done it in the other circumstance. I DO still have my job. But it isn’t all bunnies, rainbows and sparkle dust. Oh no. The final result was a “Written Warning”. The investigation process went on several weeks after I uploaded the last blog. Unfortunately this collided with some Holiday I was due to have off. I was told that I would get that time back, but alas, no. My ‘Holiday’ consisted mostly of worrying if it was indeed holiday or just delayed dismissal. I am still fighting this to this day, as I don’t see how I should be allowed to have my suspension cut off for a holiday. I know it make financial sense for the company, but it’s a bit of a kick in the (eventually metaphorical) balls. Especially as they called me in before my holiday because they thought they could come to a decision then, but then extended the investigation to find more evidence, which they didn’t even get, so it was a waste of time all round. Worst of all; my time.

Ok, let me just say, if this kind of thing bores you, I’d skip a couple of paragraphs because I’m going to be complaining a lot about how unfair everything has been.

The second thing, and worst thing, is that the job as a “Coordinator” that I had before Christmas is now not mine. I have been demoted back down to pleb. (Unofficial job title). Worse than that even, is that I’ve been told that I won’t get paid for the job that I did before Christmas because I never got “signed off”. And yet, the final verdict was made based on the fact that I was a Coordinator. Effectively then, I’ve had full responsibility for this incident and yet none of the pay. Something in that just doesn’t seem right. Again, I am still fighting this. I don’t know every aspect of the law, but I know the meaning of ‘fair’. Sure sure, life is unfair. I know. But it doesn’t mean you have to sit and take it, I plan on seeing this through. I’ve taken a bit of a backseat with it the last few weeks, just to settle back into my old job, but now I think I should really sort it out.

Now I know I haven’t mentioned any of the specifics of this incident, because to be honest with you it’s fairly in depth and a complete bore. Would not exactly be a mouse-scrollingly good read. But let me just tell you what the outcome is from my point of view. I now know that what I did was a naïve mistake, nothing more. There was no maliciousness in my actions. I did a favour for someone I thought I could trust and I end up losing my holiday, my promotion, my pay for the job I’d done, and probably a lack of faith from my superiors. Meanwhile the main person that did have malicious intentions sits back in her original position without losing pay or holiday and got away with a cheap turkey for Christmas Day. And yes that is all it was about. Turkeys that would have been thrown out anyway. Ri-freakin-diculous.

Pheeew. Right, got that off my chest. So for fairly obvious reasons I am looking for another employer. I will try and fight for what remains of my corner at my current workplace, but once I’m square I would really like to move on. Don’t know what doing, not all that bothered. Just something that pays fairly well for the moment. Maybe then I can get myself together and go learn something useful at night school and then look into starting a career I actually enjoy. I would be very interested in working in something like Photography or Advertising/Marketing. Something like that. I do enjoy writing but I don’t think my skills can really progress beyond blog writing, and let’s be honest; they do leave a lot to be desired anyway! I also wouldn’t completely write off modelling either, but I think I’d be hard-pressed to find an agency interested. Only in good taste though, not going down the ‘adult’ route in other words.

Been there, done that, removed my T-shirt.

Kidding, just thought it was funny. Ah I’m sad. Sitting here, on my own, making myself laugh by typing things into Word. Bum fluff. *Chuckle*. Poopy Head *Sniggers*. Titwank *Shakes Head with Serious Face*. That’s just going too far. No, naughty fingers, you don’t write words like that now do you. Naughty corner for you all. Go on. Going have to get by typing with my nose and fists now.

Anywho, I think you’re pretty much up to date on all the important things. And all the not so important things. I will once again try to be a little quicker providing you all with a slightly dramatised snapshot of my life once more. Enjoy my Song of the Moment. Until next time!

15th January (1)

15th January (2)

Night! X


15 Responses to “And The Results Are In….”

  1. greg Says:

    Wow! Relieved to hear everything kinda worked out for you. You know, if this work thing isn’t working out, the website thing might. You’re quite beautiful and your pictures seem to be getting better and better. I think you have a future in t-girl type modeling if you just get yourself out there a bit more and the right people see you. The website would really help. Not sure you or your girlfriend want you to become a pornstar or anything, but you could at least develop a really big following and do some professional photosets. I bet you’d look incredible with professional lighting, wardrobe, makeup and the whole bit. Anywho, I’m babbling – just wanted to say “you’ve got at least one fan fan in Canada!” World domination is only a matter of time! Now get off your pretty little butt and blog some more!

  2. Exaxis Says:

    It’s good to have you back. (I know what you mean about witnessed writing!) It’s a shame the news isn’t better but at least it’s not as bad as it could have been.
    Keep looking for another job!
    (If photography takes your fancy, have a look at (think posters rather than art), their basic account is free and it gives you the chance to not just sell some work but you get paid on the framing too (and you don’t have to package or mail out either, just upload, sit back and hope))
    (If you want to edit or remove this comment to tidy the replies up, you crack on girl 😉 ).
    There’s a lot of love around you. Take care, be well and be happy.

  3. Randi Dennis Says:

    Hey there Ella,

    Just read through this and wanted to say employers tend to be like that….and more or less like…well decency forbids me saying what they are…it would be an insult to single-celled organisms.

    That said…[and it is also in an email] do not let it get to You. These folks will be mired where they are…and You will be parsecs beyond them in the future. Trust me on this, that will be the case.

    Til later on,



  4. James Says:

    Keep the faith.Might be worthwhile,the career change.Follow your heart.

  5. sur Says:

    i’m glad you at LEAST have a job still. “life is unfair” pretty much sums up everything you’re feeling right now and i think it would be in your life’s best interest to move on to another employer. sure they allowed you to continue working, but for how long? it’s always best to just move on from a situation like that and never look back! good luck with everything and i desperately await your next post! ttyl!

  6. spacial Says:

    As Randi says, employers seem to think they have to do things to justify their existance.

    On the subject of training, can you look at your local further education college?

    They have lots of options now-a-days, some of which might even qualify for a bursary, so you can go full time.

    Your writing is really good. It’s interesting, but then you are as well.

    You could also, if you wish go full time as Ella.

    But it’s great to hear from you and that you are surviving.

    Believe me when I say, been there, done that, got the torn t-shirt. Yeah, it’s the pits, but we can bounce back

    Take care Ella. Latest pictures, really nice.

  7. nilo Says:

    it’s a pity that your mistake was naïve and there was no maliciousness.
    if it was the opposite, you was ready for a great carreer in politics.
    jokes apart, if this event gives you the energy to change direction and find a better activity, it’s not that bad.
    you surely can give and have more to/from life when you do a work you enjoy.
    hope to find you less sad and worried in the next post.

    good night,


  8. Travis Says:

    Will you marry me?

  9. Jess Says:

    Thanks for the update, I’ve missed you. When I logon, it’s your face I see, very pretty.

  10. geecee Says:

    Marry all of us! Wait – not sure that’s legal where you are. Damn!

  11. lynn Says:

    OMG you are truly beutiful

  12. Exaxis Says:

    A bit quiet again. (nudge nudge).
    I think I know something you might like to tackle that I think you’d be both up for and able to do. Write yourself a novel. Not a story; a novel. ‘Coming of age’ novels are usually predictable but you can write from experience in a way and about a subject that will wake some people up.
    A transsexual with disapproving parents is expected but an approving girlfriend is quite a new plotline.
    In fact, maybe more than a novel. Get hold of a book called “Screenwriting” by Syd Field. I think you have something to say and he can show you how. 😉
    There is one catch, you have to sit down and TYPE!
    Come on girl, we worry about you!

  13. Randi Dennis Says:

    Hey Ella,

    Just hoping that this time has not stopped that mind….or for that matter put out the spark that shows up here on the blog,

    By the by there is a little pep talk in Your email. Just a few words from someone who sadly has been there with employers down through the years….

    Til later on and Love Always,


  14. Exaxis Says:

    Hope all is well and that the absence of blog is simply because you’ve not got around to it.
    Be well.

  15. honey Says:

    Sorry, some “stranger” invading here…(as I am not an English native speaker ” pardon my French”)
    I know i’ts not easy, but keep looking on the bright site of things by all means! At this point things can feel crappy, but from what I feel, you are on the right “path”. Try to enjoy your open look on life now. Be whowever you want to be NOW, because time passed won’t come back…
    BTW : All those guys/gals at work (and elsewhere) are just frustrated, just don’t think they are better than you…quite on the contratry, don”t let them put you down!
    Take/or don’t take my adive : but Hun : Enjoy life…it’s yours…
    and if, by iff by means, I can assist in any way, I’ll be glad to do so.
    Take care…
    Hope you have a good one…I can relate to your anxienties but I hope you adress them better then me…

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