Saturday, 15 December 2007
If there’s one thing that I like about nights, other than the pay, the fact I can listen to music all the time, and that it can be rewarding, is that I can practice my female voice. I can but to be honest rarely do. What if someone came up behind me and I was speaking all girly? Would take some explaining I think! My voice is probably the most manly thing about me, apart from the obvious. My voice isn’t exactly Barry White deep, but it’s deeper than most women. When I went out in London, that was really the first time I had to speak like a girl, and due to the excessive amount of alcohol drunk, I can’t remember how well I did. Guys that spoke to me didn’t seem surprised or anything, but then I was in a TG bar, so what would they be expecting?
I just remembered, I don’t think I’ve said before, but one of the guys I was talking to kept saying that he works in the film industry. He kept saying how much he wanted me to be in one of his films. God knows what would have happened if I said yes to any of that. In fact looking back I’m so glad that I didn’t do anything completely stupid that night, because it may have all too easily got out of hand. I mean that guy was probably just someone who filmed people having sex with him, and he managed to turn that into a “film maker” for the purposes of chat up.
Anyway, yes, my voice needs a lot of practice. It has, after all, been the only thing overlooked in my general appearance as a female. I’ve had practice with mostly everything to look ok, but to sound ok, well that does get left behind. I’ve heard plenty of different methods to get the fem sounding voice; gargling without water, holding a certain note for a while, things like that. I don’t know how well that works, but I’ll look into it. There are websites dedicated to it after all.
The internet, what a powerful tool. It helps me so much. Not only to look up things like that, but for more than anything else, communication. This communication with others like me and others unlike me, has made me know myself a whole lot better, and also gives me the confidence to be that person. I really do feel sorry for those TG folk out there that didn’t have access to anything like the internet when they were my age and younger. It must have been much lonelier and you’d never really know if anyone out there felt the same as you.
Of course this is all well and good today, but I’m sure in another twenty years, when todays newborns are at my age, there’ll be even better things to help not just TG’s but everyone. Wouldn’t it be fantastic to be able to be diagnosed as being transgendered from birth, and then your parents would be fine with you in whatever gender you feel best in. They wouldn’t have got too attached to you being a boy or a girl. All the baby clothes and decorations for the new nursery would have to be changed, but that’s not much of a problem compared to the problems we have to face now.
Anyway, I’ll trot on. Here’s my face…