Wednesday, 14 November 2007
It’s like my life is in a different place all of a sudden. It just feels like I’m living in a dream at the moment. My parents know, I just can’t get my head around it. They know the real me now. All the secrets, lies and deceits from before, it’s not needed any more. Everything is so surreal. This is really going to change my life, it’s a huge event, but yet I don’t really feel anything.
I don’t really know what to say. There’s so much to talk about, but I just don’t know how to say it. My mind is racing so much I just can’t concentrate on this. I really want to just be able to get my own clothes now, go out with them knowing what I’m up to. I want to move out and start my life now! I know I can’t, I need my parents to understand first. Seen as it’s my day off tomorrow, I may go and book an appointment again at the doctors. This time my parents can come along and hopefully the doctor can help them understand.
I was quite thankful of work today. It helped me avoid my parents and gave me something else to attempt to focus on. I haven’t properly been able to look them in the eye since. It’s been bizarre, but to be honest, I did expect it to be worse than this. This morning as I left for work my Dad hugged me, he rarely does that. It was nice to know he still loves me, I’m really very lucky at how they’ve taken it so far. I know now that I’ve done all I can for the moment, now hopefully I can enjoy my life a bit more.
That’s about it for tonight, my mind is everywhere but here.