Monday, 15 October 2007
It was my day off, so I didn’t end up doing much today.
I am a bit worried about something I’ve only just noticed over the past few days. I have a small lump under the skin on my chin that can move around if you press it. I don’t have a clue what it is and quite frankly it’s makes me squirm thinking about it. Just now I was doing a bit of a search to see what it may be, and it doesn’t sound anything like cancer or anything, but I’ll keep an eye on it. The thing is when I was reading all this medical lingo about what it might be it just made me sick. I actually wanted to throw up! I am so squeamish when it comes to things like that. I don’t faint at the sight of blood, but I get awfully ill when someone starts talking about the body. I don’t know why it is, I should be grateful I have a working body!
I remember when I was at school that in one class the teacher bought out this pigs heart so we could look at all the chambers and everything. I just couldn’t face doing that. They were actually going to slice it up and look inside. I mean sure, the pig isn’t really going to mind, but it still seems wrong. I had to stand over the other side of the class room and look out the window to stop myself being sick. There was one other person that couldn’t face it either so at least I didn’t feel completely alone. I probably got a bit of stick from that though, I can’t actually remember.
I did get bullied at school, but not nearly as much as some people do. I got picked on because I was short, that was the main thing. And also because I usually hung around with girls. People kept asking if me and my best friend were boyfriend and girlfriend, and when we said “No, we’re just friends” they just then said I was gay. If ever I was called gay, or called anything, I usually just didn’t react. Just ignore the comment. Yeh they might go onto you a little bit more, but if you just continue to ignore them they’ll back off. Eventually once everyone got to know me, I didn’t get bullied, just jokingly picked on by friends. One of my current good friends now used to mess with me a bit, in fact the first memory I have of him is him spitting on my jacket. That was disgusting, and I remember disliking him for a long time. I have no idea how that relationship turned around!
My school life was pretty good looking back. I knew everyone pretty well and didn’t really have any enemies. I’m not the sort of person that gets enemies easily. There are people I dislike, but I just figure that what’s the point in being horrible, because then they’ll dislike you. And that doesn’t mean I kiss everyone’s asses either. I just dislike people disliking me. That probably comes along with my perfectionist attitude.
Well, time has passed all too quickly so I’ll just go to bed.
Currently I’m…staring at my wall thinking of something interesting I could be Currently Doing. Turns out there’s nothing!